Thank you to everyone who answered my questions - first time posting

I wanted to thank the people who gave me practical advice. It has been weighing on me all week. I am still searching but I have a plan.

Thanks for writing this out. I went through something close to it 5 months ago, and it settled down once I kept a simple log of every call and form.

Glad it helped. Reading how others handled it got me through my own bad weeks too.